Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSS

15 minute writing timer set…and…go….

“I would gladly take this from you if I could.”

I remember hearing these words from my mom and dad  and even my grandparents while growing up. They would say them when I was sick or going through a hard time. And I remember thinking that they were nuts. Why would they want to take away my pain? 

Even if I questioned their sanity, it was a window into a deep love that I didn’t really understand until I had my own kids. 

I would so gladly die for my kids and take away all pain from them if I could. There isn’t even a slight hesitation. 

I find myself saying the same words to them and my wife and my parents and my loved ones now.

But. 

I have to say that I am glad my parents and grandparents were not able to take my pain as their own. Yes, it meant the world to me that they would care so much as to be willing to sacrifice their comfort. 

But the painful times shaped me, they helped me grow, they were and are my teachers. I truly would not be who I am without going through the pain.

And I wouldn’t be who I am without going through the pain with the deep knowledge that I was loved so much that more than one person in my life would gladly trade places so that I might experience relief.

A good friend related an emotional story about when he was a child and saw a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. He thought it was hurting and so he helped it by pulling the cocoon apart. Instead of flying away, the butterfly’s wings were not strong enough and it died. Even many years after this, my friend still feels the emotional weight of that moment. 

It’s a story that many are familiar with but it is signifiant nonetheless.

The struggle to break free from the cocoon is part of what strengthens the butterfly’s wings so that it can fly. 

The struggle, the discomfort, the pain  - it is all necessary in the story of growth and life and freedom.

Over the course of the last 24 hours, I have felt such longing to take away my children’s pain as they go through all the things that teenagers go through. 

I want to rescue them. I want them to get to the other side. I want them to fly and be free.

And I also know that these experiences are helping shape them and form them so that they can fly and be free and get to the other side.

So, I hear myself saying, “I would so gladly take this from you” even while I know that I cannot.

And I also know that even if I cannot rescue them, it matters so deeply that they know I would if I could.

Time